Amanda and the Hendersons

Today  is day +23. Can you believe that? Parklen is doing amazing....... he really is. He is rocking this so hard......... I wish it were possible to actually explain how amazing he is doing. His surgery earlier this week to remove his lines went great and he recovered so well. He is getting by for now with just the PICC line in his arm and there aren't any signs of infection anymore. Today he threw up another feeding tube, that stinks. However, he is doing well enough that if he can eat on his own they will leave it out. He has a couple of days to show what he can do!!! Can I tell you that a lot of the kids who go through Bone marrow transplant get nutrition through an IV.....or a feeding tube. Most of these kids feel sick. at least at some point. Parklen's counts are rising..... quicker than anticipated. They are on the fast track to where they need to be. We are so pleased. It never gets old to watch the doctors enter the room and smile. It never g...

I haven't been writing everyday.... It isn't because I don't want to...... I do. Today is day +21 Yes. Three weeks out!!! Three weeks since day zero. Parklen had a surgery yesterday to remove both of his central lines from his chest due to an infection. He did great. The procedure hardly phased him. He was up and crazy in no time flat.....even waving, shouting hellos and smiling through his mask as he was being wheeled back up to his room. Can you imagine? Being five years old..... going under anesthesia for over 2 and a half hours...... and waking up as if "it ain't no thang"...... This kid never ceases to amaze me......... and everyone else. The other day I had a woman knock on his door. A stranger. She handed me a batman coloring book and some crayons...... She said, "Hi, you don't know me but I walk by here every day and your son waves and smiles at me so much......he makes my day.  I had to bring him something to show hi...

Today is exactly one week until my thirtieth birthday! I have dreaded this birthday for years....... since I turned 25 to be exact. It has always seemed so "old" I can think back to being a teenager and thinking that people who were 30 were ancient. Pffft. Isn't it funny how perspective can change so much over the years you live. It wasn't until about a week ago when I really started to feel ok about turning 30. It happened when I was talking with a nurse. She, the same age as me, was the 3rd person in one week to say, "you are ONLY going to be 30?" At first glance this statement is pretty awful. It wasn't until I further spoke to these ladies that I began to understand what they meant. Each one was my age, close or older. Each one is not yet married and has no kids. In the world we live in success is often measured by different things..... your occupation, your money, your home..... the clothes you wear. Hearing other women...

Today is day +17. A good day for Parklen. He has felt great, tired....but great. His mood shifts as the clouds move across the sky.....   Highs and lows..... but mostly high....... His counts are close to yesterday.... they are beginning to go where they need to be. He isn't throwing up. He smiles through the day........... gives a lot of hugs and snuggles. There are still some infection issues with his blood tests...... this could result in a minor surgery to remove his central lines.....which would need replacing when the infection is gone... We are praying that over the next couple of days, the antibiotics take care of things and no surgery is needed.......they estimate about a 50/50 chance......but God doesn't care about statistics. There is something about being in a children's hospital. There is something about being in the bone marrow transplant unit. It is a hard place to be. Hard because you wouldn't be there is your child wasn't sic...

Older pic.....but one of my faves... Last night I had just finished up with writing a blog post, I was about to hit publish when i got a phone call. It was my night to sleep at the apartment and I had gotten Phin down for bed and was just enjoying a few moments to myself before heading to bed. When I had left the hospital last night everything was good and well. So I was not expecting a phone call. Something with Parklen's room at the hospital makes it hard for anyone in there to make or receive calls, my mom was cutting out and I started to panic. With Phin is bed, I did not want to yank her awake and head over until I knew what was going on. I finally got the message....... Parklen had gotten sick..........again. He had thrown up his feeding tube and just wanted his mom. I loaded up the baby and headed over, it was nearly 11:00. I didn't feel too worried, just sad. I wanted to comfort my baby. These are the moments when I regret ever leaving the hospita...

Yesterday was another great day. He felt great the entire day..... slept in quite a bit and went to bed pretty early. But between all of that, he smiled. A few things came up with his positive cultures he had the other day, they had to switch to a different med because the bug is showing to be more resistant than originally thought. Still, at this point.....not a huge deal. Today started out quite the same. He slept in rather late. Woke up in a pretty good mood. Felt great. and then, in a moments notice.....he didn't. The doctors had just left.... they had talked about how he was tolerating his feeds well, he was gaining weight and how impressed they were that he hadn't gotten sick. It came on quickly and with out warning, a comment about an upset stomach, a scream from the pain...... and then vomit. He puked out his feeding tube when he got sick.....not such a huge deal, except.....he needs a feeding tube. Almost as quickly as it came on.......it ...

Yesterday Parklen was sitting on my lap. I was running my fingers over his hair, like I normally do.... I looked down and noticed that in the palm of my hand sat a bunch of tiny blond hairs. Each stroke of my fingers rendered more hair.... You see moments such as this in movies.............hair falling out with each touch of the person's head and sadness usually follows the realization of the losing of your locks.... This is Parky's fighing face As I peered down at my shirt where Parklen had rested his head, I noticed that it was covered.....there was so much hair... I looked back to my hand..... I didn't feel sad. As I studied each hair, my heart felt......glad. I started to think of it metaphorically.... Each hair coming out of my precious boys head felt like one step closer to a new start.... as if each one of those tiny blond hairs was one moment of heartache. Each pile of hair was worth a day of pain...... and all of those days  and those moment...