Wednesday, November 23, 2011


I turned 28 today,
It was a good day.
The transition was made slightly better by the fact that an oral surgery on Monday  left my face slightly swollen, seriously making me look 5 years younger(cant you see the humor in my insanity)....I woke up and said, "oh my gosh Devan, look how young I look."  he thinks I'm nuts, this I am sure.

My boys helped with breakfast,
I got the boots I have had my eye on,
I was treated to lunch,
and received a million Happy Birthday messages.
I will be given a night away from motherhood this weekend, and  rest will come.
Tomorrow my home will be filled with twenty people,
I will be partaking in some wonderful Black Friday Shopping,
What a week.

The last 28 years have gone so fast.
They have molded me into this woman I have become,
this crazy,
nut of a woman.

I turned 28 today,
it was a good day.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011


Maybe its because I feel like the past three years were so tough, or that I didn't get the chance to "just" be 25, 26, or 27 but turning 28 next week is freaking me out. (I'm sure the majority is because its almost 30)

Life is just so funny.  I can remember looking down the road and deciding what I wanted for my life and taking certain steps to make it happen....guess what Amanda, you are NOT in control.  Don't let the whole "you control your own destiny" bit fool you....its rubbish.

I chose my husband as he chose me, and seriously I believed that life would go as I had planned....far from the truth, we decided how many children we would have (it was 4 by the case you forgot Devan) Where we would live, what we would do.

It took an earth rattling shake for me to realize that life is nothing that you can plan....this is a super great thing to accept while you are still floating above water, instead of waiting until a wave comes crashing in for a drowning attempt like I did.  In my case it was wave upon wave upon wave...and I would be a HUGE liar if I said the waves have stopped.  They are relentless.

I had my faith, I had my beliefs but they had never been tested.  So now, looking back, I don't think they were really real. It wasn't until I had nothing left but God himself to cling to that I realized he is driving this life boat at ALL times.  I have lost so much in the past three years, SO much.  Believe me when I say, I should be Divorced, and crazy as according to this world's view.  But I'm not.  (The "crazy" part is really debatable, it would probably depend on who you ask.)

The losses I have faced in the past three years don't even compare to what I have gained.....maturity, faith, experience, friends, and a Three year old little boy......who is HERE. 

Yeah, If I look at photos from age 24 and compare them with ones today...I can see the stress written clearly on my face. It appears as though there has been ten years between the photos, not three...but, what can I change about this? nothing. 

So, as I am writing all this down....I realize that I can stop whining about the upcoming birthday. And smile as I turn a year older....after all, its just another day. And how blessed am I to be alive, so bring it on.....

Monday, November 14, 2011

Poopy day......

I would be flat out lying if I said, "today was AWESOME..."  It didnt start good......I have come to live on just a couple hours of sleep, Parklen gives me no choice in this matter.  I have even learned to cope with being soaked in poop.....(now there is something I never thought I would say.) 

We didnt sleep, Parky and I...he was up sick.  Once the sun took its place in the sky we just stopped trying...It seems that he has another infection in his bowels.  No biggie, we are used to dealing with this....

The doctor has to make sure of which infection he has, so until then....he is in quarentine.....not to sicken any other children...we are blessed to have an immunity built up against most of Parky's illnesses.

I will tell you something, (and if you have a weak stomach, you may wanna stop reading now)  It is not an easy task to get a poop sample from your three year old....and surely not fun.  The nurse at the doctors office reccommended I try catching some in a I did, and marched it right into the lab....
of course, they didnt take it....I had to use THEIR container.....SOOO, now I am the lady who carried a ziplock full of poop into the waiting area of the lab.....yup thats me....

I was pooped on so many times today that I cant count, BUT.....thats my life....And I am thankful that Parklen is here to make those messes....thankful that I am cleaning up from this, most poopy of days.

MAN, I really talked about poop a lot...sorry about that......

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

My love, My partner, My number one fan......
We have seen more than some couples twice our age....
We have made it through some very deep valleys,
Climbed some Steep mountains....
We have grown in our faith,
We have grown in our understanding of love,
We know that it is an action and not a feeling....
And we choose to love each other.

We get fed up with each other,
We get caught up in each other.
You make me laugh,
You make me crazy,
and I know I do the same.

God could not have chosen a better partner for me,
We fit together....
Today I am celebrating you,
its not your birthday,
Its not our anniversary,
Its just the day that I love you and am thankful for you as my husband.