been a day...







"It has been a day......"
I thought to myself as I slumped down into the couch...
The kids finally tucked into their beds,
and the first moment of silence for the day rang calmly in my ears....

The moment of peace quickly faded as the list of worries quickly found their place at the forefront of my mind.... constant. Ever present....

It has been more than a day.....


There is an elephant that smiles down at me as he perches himself upon my chest....as if to say,
"Yes, I'm still here..."
Although, I already know this to be true...because the weight .....oh the weight...is hard to bear...
Each breath feels heavy and hard to grasp....

and why?!?!

Not one reason....but many.
The worry resides...

The ever present companion....
The unknown...

I yearn for a breath so deep...
for the weight to be lifted.

and Yet,
I struggle.

Too much swimming through the rivers of my mind to convey...
too deep of waters to wade...

I pray for relief...
and I know...
He hears...
but for now, He is quiet...

When you think of it....wont you pray for me? For us? For the breath....for the weight to be lifted.
We know...I know that the goodness of God will overcome...even in dark days...

It seems that in the midst of struggle...life carries on... Phin just turned 3, are you kidding me? Parklen is currently preparing to turn EIGHT...that cannot be possible...  Devan is working on the biggest project of his graduate school career...he presents this week.... Paysen...growing, in height and character....

And so... I carry on.....




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{zero}

26 days.............